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Cowboys vs. Vikings Position-by-Position Breakdown: Quarterback

In which I make like I’m some kinda football wonk…

Cowboys:  Tony Romo

There was a monkey riding on his back – or maybe it was a baby orangutan; anyway, it was some kind of small animal – until this weekend’s win vs. the Eagles when the monkey either jumped off or was forcibly removed.  Now it should be easier for Romo to play, cause he no longer has some critter pooping down his neck.  Also, as far as I know, he isn’t dating any pop stars who got cursed by gypsies, which is always a plus.

Vikings:  Brett Favre

He could use his giant angel wings to create a mighty wind that blows the whole Cowboy defense into the cheap seats, but that would be cheating.  So he will just have to employ his mystic defense-reading powers which he attained after killing Medusa and bringing her severed head back to the wizard.

Advantage:  Vikings

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Tags: Brett Favre Dallas Cowboys Minnesota Vikings Tony Romo

  • Mike


  • lorenzo4

    That’s the best damn obfuscating pontification faux punditry I have read yet. Despite reliable facts and figures to back up your analysis it is above and beyond anything I have read on The SI or The ESPN. I can hardly wait for future installments.
    Somewhere around the 2nd quarter the critter will commence pooping down Romo’s neck again. And Favre will hit The Rookie of the Year with such blazing speed that no one will even be able to see it.

  • KD

    How about Favre’s critter? He’s 0-3 against teams with Wade Phillips in the Playoffs. 2-6 vs. the Cowboys all time, and 0-2 in the playoffs against the Cowboys?

    If Favre had something that even halfway resembled a solid O-Line I’d say he’s going to tear the Boys apart, but since this isn’t 2-hand touch with a 5 second quarterback rush it’s going to be tough to say with any certainty how he’s going to play.

    He will be good IN SPITE of his O-Line, rather than being good BECAUSE OF them (like Romo is.. not entirely but somewhat)

  • Bugs

    So what, 31-7 Cowboys, you reckon?

  • Kako

    Grandpa is saying they got this win already against Dallas. But guess what crazy Viking fan your going to be watching next week. I’m ready for this game.

  • Truitt

    Dallas this year has more rushing and recieving yards this season than you Vikings. The only important stat that Minnesota attains is more points per game. But, Dallas would too if they got to play Detriot twice a season. Mike Jenkins will come away with two interceptions, Brett will be sacked about 6 times and could be injured depending on how many Viagras that old twat has taken in the past weeks, and Cowboys will come out on top 30-17. Enjoy this game Vikings’ fans because it’s your last of the season!

  • lorenzo4

    somewhere in Texas a village is missing a troll.

    BTW, Danz, waiting for another installment of position-by-position breakdown. Now that’s some serious football talk.

  • vikestiltheend

    This guy claims to be a die hard vikings fan? I’ve been a viking fan since birth and yes they have blown some good one’s. Tears rolled in 98 championship game but anyway…. I believe. The vikes are gonna hand the cowboys their ass and send them packing. I havent seen a bad game in the metrodome this year. I say the vikes stomp the Cowboys.