Adrian Peterson is great at a lot of things. Recovering from catastrophic knee injuries. Trucking fools. Riding in his own parade on Adrian Peterson Day…
But believe it or not he’s not great at everything. It’s true. There are several notable things Adrian doesn’t do well. He doesn’t pick up blitzes worth a darn. He can’t lay off the gas pedal. Oh, and he’s terrrrrrrible at giving gifts:
John Sullivan has the deadpan thing down cold. He could be the next Leslie Nielsen. Is he hilarious with the Shake Weight or what?
Jared Allen, it’s a Miley Cyrus onesie. You don’t know that because you’re a Taylor Swift fan. Time to branch out musically.
Matt Cassel, anything is better than that thing on your face, even a plastic one. The Village People called, they’d like you to audition.
Brian Robison, it’s okay. Just think happy thoughts. Nick Saban Nick Saban Nick Saban. Keep saying it to yourself over and over.
All Greg Jennings wants for Christmas is another fifty targets from Matt Cassel. He can easily get that in three games.