I don’t know about you, but the Jared Allen trade has knocked any enthusiasm I might’ve had for the draft right out of me.
Not that I was very stoked to begin with. I mean, the draft is fun if you have a really high pick, like last year when the Vikings picked 7th and got to take Adrian Peterson. But when your first pick isn’t until the late teens, and you have to try to get worked up over the third best defensive end or fourth best offensive tackle or a safety you’ve never heard of in your life? Sorry, but that’s not my idea of a great way to spend a Saturday afternoon.
And now, with the Vikings not picking at all until the second round, the draft has become about as appealing as a bag of Doritos I found under my bed after two months.
Don’t get me wrong…I’m glad they made the trade for Jared Allen. It was the right move given where this team is at. Take the shot now, before Adrian Peterson suffers some catastrophic knee injury; before the Williams Wall becomes the Williams Curb; before Darren Sharper and Antoine Winfield become eligible for the senior citizens discount at Denny’s.
I wouldn’t give Jared Allen back for five draft picks. Having a player of his caliber, in the prime of his career, is better than all the draft-anticipation in the world.
I don’t mind being left out of the draft merriment, I guess is what I’m trying to say. It feels kind of cool actually. Like we’re one of those really good teams that pick low every year and therefore don’t experience so much draft-drama.
I’ve had quite enough draft-drama for one life, thanks. And more than enough draft-comedy.
But enough about Mike Tice…
Seriously though…the draft is a horribly over-hyped event, don’t you think? Endless hours of blow-hards going on about some left-guard from some college you’ve never watched play even once in your life. I’d rather watch American Idol.
Actually, that gives me an idea…why not spice up the draft by bringing in some American Idol elements? Have the guys sing. Wouldn’t you love to hear Jake Long belt out a Celine Dion tune? And then you could bring on some has-beens for duets. Darren McFadden and Bobby McFerrin. Glenn Dorsey and Glenn Frey. Chris Long and Chris Cornell. Anything that shut up Mel Kiper for a minute would be welcome.