Innocent Goat Rescued from Horrible Favre-Related Death
By Dan Zinski
The Adrian Peterson duck-murder story wasn’t bad enough. Now we have a story about a crazy Brett Favre hater, a goat and a benevolent garage mechanic. Via WinonaDailyNews.com:
"Auto repairman James Prusci has seen some unusual things left in the cars he works on, but nothing quite like what he found Friday in the trunk of a Chevy Malibu.A woman came into the Tires Plus in Winona just before noon, asking if the shop had time to replace a belt.Prusci started the paperwork.“Oh, by the way,” the woman said. “I have a goat in my trunk.”Prusci didn’t think he heard her right.“A what?”“Yes, a goat,” the woman said. “And it’s alive.”She planned to butcher the animal later but was passing through Winona on her way to St. Paul when the car broke down, Prusci remembered her saying.The woman, and a man and child who were waiting for her outside, left while Prusci and other workers began the repairs.After about 10 minutes, they could hear the goat crying.“We cracked open the trunk, you know, so it could breathe,” Prusci said. “And sure enough, there it was. It kind of poked its head up.”The goat had been painted purple and gold – the colors for the Minnesota Vikings. Shaved into its side was the No. 4 – the number of Brett Favre, who made his Vikings debut Friday night in a preseason game in the Twin Cities.The goat was lying on its side, tied at its feet. Prusci said it had some pretty big horns."
The story has a relatively happy ending: Before the would-be goat sacrificer could come back and pick up her car, kindly mechanic Prusci called animal control. When the woman did return, Prusci delivered a stern lecture. The goat was taken to a vet to be looked at and the woman presumably went off to find another goat.
Okay, I have to confess: I considered trying something like this too. That’s how desperate I was to make sure Brett Favre didn’t become a Viking. But, I came to my senses when I realized that voodoo doesn’t work, and that I didn’t know where to get a goat. Plus, I have a soft spot in my heart for animals, and I don’t think I could ever kill one.
Unless I knew for sure that killing it would cause Favre to go away.