OTAs Give Us a Fake Football Fix

Jul 27, 2012; Mankato, MN, USA; Minnesota Vikings quarterback McLeod Bethel-Thompson (4) passes in drills at training camp at Blakeslee Stadium at Minnesota State University, Mankato. Mandatory Credit: Bruce Kluckhohn-USA TODAY Sports

Hardcore fans never get sick of reading about football. Thank goodness for that otherwise this blog would have to go on hiatus for several months out of the year. Of course for much of the offseason there isn’t really anything worth reading about. There isn’t anything really newsworthy happening. But the media and those of us who feed off what the media put out there? We don’t mind. We will happily fake it for the sake of pageviews.

There will be plenty of faking it going on for the next few days as the Vikings enter OTAs. Players and coaches will roll into Winter Park. There will be press conferences and interviews. Quotes will be used to build speculative stories. What about that right guard battle coach? Is Joe Webb still a receiver or is he moving to place kicker? How confident are you in Christian Ponder? Give a percentage please. 90%? 99.5%? 150%?

And then the actual OTAs themselves. Fake practice! Which unheralded UDFA will be declared a future superstar? How much play will James Vandenberg get? That’s the QB they signed out of Iowa for those who haven’t been paying attention. Trust me, some nitwit out there will fall in love with the guy. On the basis of what? One good pass in some dopey OTA drill?

None of it matters. But we’ll pretend it matters because it’s football. And we’re just desperate for anything to talk about. Read about. Speculate about. This crap owns us. And the NFL knows it and the media know it. That’s how they get away with presenting this crap as news. It’s actually a farce. We are all just dancing monkeys. But what the hell? What else are we gonna do? Watch baseball?

Hand me my monkey-sized dancing shoes. I’m ready to go.

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