Mark Dayton Wants Cigarette Tax to Help Build Vikings Stadium

So about that whole stadium financing thing. Turns out electronic pull tabs aren’t going to be enough. And you thought all that was hashed out before the deal was signed? Guess again. Even as fans digest the details of the new awesome sci-fi stadium the Vikings have planned, Minnesota lawmakers are scrambling to figure out how the heck they’re going to pay for their $348 million share.

Governor Mark Dayton has an idea. Just tax cigarettes!

Dayton has introduced a new proposal that would raise the state tax on heaters from $1.23 per pack to $2.83 per pack. Does that sound outrageous? Well compared to other states it’s really not. For instance, in Wisconsin the tax is already $2.52 per pack. If you smoke in New York? You’re shelling out an extra $4.35 per pack. I’d reach for the Nicorette if I lived in New York, but that’s just me. Hypnotherapy?

Seems to me – and I’m just a dude with a blog, mind you – that this sort of move was always inevitable. Did anyone really believe you could raise that much money on electronic pull tabs? Seems that was more of a holding pattern kind of idea than anything. Throw that bogus scheme out there and buy some time to think of something legit.

And of course the “legit” idea is a tax. Cause it was always going to be a tax. Cause taxes are how you pay for big expensive projects. So the Vikings will get their stadium and Minnesota smokers will be lighter in the wallet.

When the stadium is finally built and needs a cute nickname, just call it The House That Cancer Built. Show your tracheotomy scar, get in free!

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